Thursday, June 14, 2007

Britain's Got Talent

Ok guys, this is my PSA to the folks back home and around the world. There is a fantastic show on this side of the pond called "Britain's Got Talent," and you simply must watch it. If my memory serves me right, they tried to make a version of the show in the US, but I never watched it because frankly, the acts they showed in commercials didn't look very talented. I'm not a big reality show person, and I don't even watch American Idol, but this show is simply brilliant. It's made me laugh, it's made me cry -- it's fan-freaking-tastic. It's cheesy, heartwarming, and hilarious -- this is what television should be!

The person who wins this show gets to perform in front of the Queen of England at the annual Royal Variety Show. And for the "Love Actually" fans, you might recognize the two hosts of "Britain's Got Talent" from the movie.

For your viewing pleasure, and thanks to the fabulous invention that is You Tube, I've included links to six clips below (the first four are my favorite).

1) Paul Pott, an overweight cell phone salesman with bad teeth and little self-confidence. He also happens to have a beautiful voice, and you know he's never been given a chance in life. He sings 'Nessun Dorma.' I start tearing up just watching it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1k08yxu57NA

2) Damon Scott and Bubbles. A man, a monkey puppet, and the music of Michael Jackson. So, so hilarious:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pqRd_4wY8hs

3) Craig the Baton Twirler. A performance that reminds you of Billy Elliot, and makes your heart grow just a little bit bigger:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w8q5QJOwoG4

4) Conny, an adorable six-year old girl missing her two front teeth, who sings "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" beautifully:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=En0A8KGMgq8

5) Ladies and Gentleman: The Kit Kat Dolls. Makes me miss AsiaSF:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_RCq6x48Y0w

And finally, I have never in my life seen anything quite like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=he-eSFt7rck

Seriously, take a few minutes from your day and watch these -- you won't regret it! And let me know what you think! :)

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Just a little summertime hail


Summer in the City

For better or worse, summer has arrived in Vienna, and it is uncharacteristically hot and sticky. Here are some random observations from the past weekend:

1) I am sitting in our room on a Sunday afternoon because it is 88 degrees outside and it has started hailing. Yes, hailing. Golf ball-sized chunks of ice are coming from the sky, there is lots of thunder and lightning, but it’s still hot outside. Two hours ago I was thinking of going for a swim in the Danube. Now I might lose an eye to an errant piece of frozen water falling from the heavens if I walk out the door. Seriously, if this isn’t global warming, I don’t know what is.

2) There is a love affair between European men and Capri pants that defies explanation. It’s one of the stranger fashion things I’ve seen here – even stranger than men in Speedos.

3) Wait, I take that back. What’s more strange are seeing men in truly short shorts. Whenever I see them, I start singing the 1980s jingle for Nair: “Who wears short shorts?” And no, they don’t use a hair removal product.

4) The tourists have arrived—literally by the busload. They’re everywhere, and it’s insane. When we walked home from the U-Bahn station by our house yesterday, I counted 13 tour buses that were parked nearby. I realize I’m still a bit of a tourist myself, but tourists travel in packs here. For protection maybe – certainly not for warmth. They come Eastern Europe, Japan, China, as well as senior citizen tours from England and the US, and even Contiki tour buses, filled with the rejects of a “Girls Gone Wild” Europe special.

5) One out of every ten U-Bahn trains has air-conditioning, and none of the buses have A/C. As a result, a world of aromas comes alive on the public transit system. It’s such a cliché, but it’s absolutely true. I try to be culturally relative, but the reality is that with all the tourists here, the trains are packed to the brim at all hours of the day, and particularly on weekends, so you’re standing cheek to cheek with a half-dozen hot, sweaty people, and it’s a feast for the senses.

6) Ok, screw cultural relativism. If men in Austria have a love affair with Capri pants, then women have a love affair with panty hose. It’s one thing to wear them to work (I myself do from time to time). It’s quite another to wear them on a hot, humid weekend, with shorts or a casual skirt – and you clearly aren’t going to a nice dinner, church, etc. They have to be absolutely miserable, and it just doesn’t make sense to me. If you haven’t shaved your legs, who cares?!? Give your gams a break and let them breathe! I just want to liberate all these women, get them to rip their panty hose off ala burning their bras in the ‘60s. I just don’t understand it. I’m sure it’s a cultural thing, but I feel very sorry for them – and I feel like I don’t fit in because I won’t do it myself.

7) No A/C at all, and very few places that serve ice with drinks in Vienna. I am so spoiled by the US. It’s not the end of the world to not have A/C or ice, but good Lord do I crave an icy drink sometimes. Next time you pour yourself an ice-cold glass of water, look at the glass and say thank you. It is a wonderful, beautiful luxury.

It has stopped hailing but is still raining, so I might try and get out for a few minutes. Ta ta for now, and we love and miss you all!

Saturday, June 9, 2007

Adventures in German Appliances Part Two: The Dinner Party

Being at the UN is for many of us a short-term thing, so as a result it seems there are an endless stream of goodbye parties and farewell get-togethers, as well as new faces and people to meet. It’s a rapidly revolving diplomatic door sadly.

So as a result, the time came for Rebecca, an Aussie who’s become one of my closest friends in Vienna, to say farewell, and so we decided to have a group of friends over for a casual dinner party last Saturday. Wanting to prepare something uniquely American, I decided upon Janie’s recipe for baked potato soup. It’s a relatively simple recipe, but complicated by the fact that I’m trying to prepare an American dish outside of America. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

I awoke that morning excited, because I haven’t had an opportunity to do much cooking here. Then I remembered why: I am metrically and Celsius-ly challenged. All my life I’ve only known cups, tablespoons, and teaspoons, and I’ve only measured temperature in Fahrenheit, so it’s when you’re abroad that you realize that we’re the only people in the world who use this system. Literally, we’re the only ones. And it’s ridiculous. For example, experience the instant humility when you look at a recipe (that you were so thrilled to find in English) and realize you have no clue how 75 grams of butter is, or ¾ liter of water. Math never was my strong suit. Or you pick up a package in a grocery store, and the entire thing is written in German, so you have no idea what it says – and the required amount of ingredients is in the metric system too. Thanks founding fathers for making us so “special.”

Similarly, when trying to make a recipe from back home, you have to go into a grocery store and guessitimate on what the quantities you know (such as 1/3 cup flour or ¾ cup milk) will look like in grams and liters. Most of the time you can do reasonably ok with this, but it’s a minor irritation at the most irritating of all places in Vienna – a grocery store – so it’s even more exasperating. When I’m feeling in a crabby mood I’ll regale everyone with just what an experience at a Viennese grocery store can be like. But I’ll leave that diatribe for another day.

Now that I’m in the grocery store, I’m looking for potatoes, sour cream, cheddar cheese, bacon, green onions, milk, sour cream, and flour. I find the potatoes and green onions easily, though the potatoes are some of the smallest I’ve ever seen (almost fingerling), so I have to buy many more of them in order to equal the four large potatoes the recipe calls for. Continuing into the dairy section, I look for milk and sour cream, and again I find the milk easily – but as there are no gallon or half-gallon milk options, I have to buy several containers in order to get the seven cups I need. Sour cream is another story. I stare at the cream section, and none of the German names give me the sense that one of the items is sour cream. I hold the containers up to the light and shake them a bit in the hope of figuring it out by consistency. I end up going with crème fraiche, because at least I know what it is, and in a pinch it will do.

As I move down the aisle I get to the packaged meat section, and I am lucky to get the last package of American-style bacon – not Canadian bacon, not prosciutto, or anything similar but not quite right. And when I get to the cheese section, I remember that cheddar is an American cheese, born from the fine cows of Wisconsin, Oregon, and California -- not from the heifers of Österreich. Shit. But then I scan the section and find something vaguely orange, and its Irish cheddar cheese – hooray! Again, not ideal, but it will do. Finally, I go to the baking aisle, and nearly have a nervous breakdown when I see the plethora of flour options – or rather, what I hope is flour. I decide on the brand that has the kind German grandmother on the front (because, hey, Grandma can’t let me down, right? Right?!?), but as its written entirely in German, I have no idea which variety is which, and what will be best for the soup. I do the same shake I did with the creams, and try to fool myself into thinking I can understand the subtle nuances of flour. One round of Eenie-meanie-minie-mo, and I’ve made my decision and am on my way home.

I specifically decided against baking something for the dinner party because of the many opportunities baking would offer for me to royally screw things up. Our apartment, though lovely, lacks most measuring utensils. As a result, I do most of my ‘measuring’ with a black coffee mug that, when filled with hot liquid, changes color to display a large set of breasts. It adds that ‘little something extra’ to the overall cooking experience. And while it’s not a big deal in cooking to lack measuring utensils, in baking it could end very, very badly. Plus our oven is in Celsius, so I would have to convert all the needed temperatures from Fahrenheit – not a big deal, but a minor irritation nonetheless. And like the microwave, the oven also comes with a knob full of pictures, for which I only know the use of one. Or more accurately, my roommate Marlene told me once to use one of the settings when I cooked a pizza, and I’ve used it for everything else ever since. Here’s hoping I don’t burn the apartment down one day.

Once I’m home and get settled, we make the soup with only minor setbacks (like peeling the tiny cooked potatoes with our hands because we realize there isn’t a potato peeler in the apartment, and using ice bucket tons to turn the bacon), and it was a surprise success. It felt good to show people that American food is more than what’s on the menu at McDonald’s (a comment said to us by one of our friends). So all in all the night was a success, but I won’t lie and say that I’m not looking forward to being able to cook in our own home and be able to purchase and measure out whatever ingredients I need, and put them in an oven pre-heated to 350 degrees Fahrenheit. Maybe with a cup of sour cream in one hand and an American flag in the other.

Tuesday, June 5, 2007

Some recent pictures...









A whirlwind Saturday night in front of Stephansdom Cathedral

Nifty Day-to-Day Practicalities

I feel like I’ve been a bit hard on Vienna in my recent posts, and while its true that there some things here that are simply ‘harder’ or not done as well as back home, there are some very cool things that I have come to enjoy here, so I thought I would create a little list below.

1) Double-sided printers: I imagine these exist in the US, but I’ve never seen them at home. It’s simply a computer printer that prints documents out double-sided. They use half the amount of paper (good for the environment) and create half as much clutter on my desk (good for my sanity). Brilliant.

2) Truly fantastic public transit. Boy, could the states learn a thing or two about public transit from Vienna. It’s fast, efficient, clean, relatively cheap, and takes you anywhere you need to go. One pass allows you to use the buses, trams, S-Bahn, and U-bahn, and during peak times your maximum wait for a train or bus is four minutes. They even offer magazines for you to read on the underground, but since the trains move so quickly you don’t even have much time to read. There are even signs throughout the station telling you how long until the next train arrives, and night buses that run after the U-bahn shuts down at 12:30am.

3) Free festivals. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Vienna knows how to show its residents a good time, regardless of your budget. Whether it’s a free concert by the Vienna Philharmonic at Schonbrunn Palace with Bill Clinton in attendance, or a street festival with live music and free art supplies, they encourage you to be a part of the wealth of cultural offerings in the city.

4) Beer and wine are cheaper than soda at every restaurant – usually two or three Euros max. And at the UN Bar, a large glass of wine is 1.50 Euros. Enough said.

5) The Vienna Opera house offers standing room tickets for 2 or 3 Euros for every single opera or ballet performance. True, you have to stand (sometimes packed in like sardines) but if your dream is to see Placido Domingo perform live and you don’t have a lot of expendable income, you can get in line and have a reasonable chance of seeing him perform for less than the cost of a piece of Sacher torte.

6) Large pedestrian walkways. It’s common throughout Europe and not exclusive to Vienna, but throughout the city there are large promenades, walkways, and pedestrian-only streets that are fantastic to stroll through. It’s a city that encourages you to walk.

7) The Hofburgs loved parks and the natural environment, so Vienna has more dedicated parks and natural spaces than any other major city in Europe. Given its relatively small size this is even more impressive, and its something I’ve truly loved.

8) Gelateria Hoher Markt. All the tourists go to Zanoni and Zanoni gelateria. Go around the corner, walk up the street a block and you’ll find the best gelato outside of Italy, and for less money than Zanoni. Their ‘Obers Kirsches’ gelato, which is essentially vanilla and sour cherry, is crack in a cup. Or what I imagine crack must be like. I swear to you, I don’t know what I’m going to do without it. I might have to buy an ice cream maker and try to do it on my own. Cherry Garcia and Winter White Chocolate can’t hold a candle to it.

9) Expanding upon the above, they really know how to do desserts and sweets here. Cakes, tortes, strudel, you name it – they do it all, and it’s a fan-freaking-tastic. It’s a dessert lover’s dream. Too bad my hips and thighs disagree.

10) Toilets with a two flushing options. You guessed it – for number one and number two. It saves water and energy to use the former, and gives you the option for a longer, ‘standard’ flush with the second button.

11) Also in the bathroom, they use large spools of ‘real towels’ that rotate in a machine to provide you with a clean and dry section of towel to dry your hands, then retract the used portion of towel back into the machine. Then they take out the towel and wash it once the entire spool has been used. It is less wasteful and better at drying your hands than paper towels (Can you tell I’m impressed with their green, energy efficient practices?)

12) Windows that open outward from the top. This is a little hard to describe, but windows in Austria have the option of opening up completely (almost like a small door), or you can choose to have them open at an angle from the top, letting in some fresh air but not a pigeon as well.

You may have picked up on the fact that this list is my pathetic attempt at satisfying requests for a blog post without having to write anything substantive. I promise to put up another post very soon, but my free time at the moment is pretty much consumed with looking for jobs in Connecticut and updating and improving my cover letter and resume. Ah, the joy of being brought back to reality.

And since Todd’s computer is our ‘television,’ phone, and Internet connection, I don’t want to monopolize it too much -- though he has been a sweetheart and not complained. Long story short, you will see another post from me – hopefully in the next day or two. Thank you as always for the posted comments and emails, and we love and miss you all!